why do I bother at all. How can you mend a broken heart.

Basically right now, why do I bother at all with anything. My life sucks, I can't work, the man I love has a baby and the mother is with the baby so that's that. I mean nothing to anyone. I'm so down right now. All I know is that I'll never love anyone else. Never go out again, I'm so done, and I can't stop crying. All this because of a picture. I go see the doctor tomorrow, maybe she can give me some proprophol -adios Michael Jackson style. It wouldn't work, nothing works on me. Doomed never to sleep, I say I'll never see him again, but am really weak where he's concerned. Why am I torturing myself? At least I'll get some meds tomorrow and get out of pain for a little while, life is so unfair. Why some suffer so much and others skate through life unaffected by anything. I need to wrap up tonight, have to get up early to drive to Oceanside for the neurologist. How can you mend a broken heart? Loads of painkillers.