OMG! I got a Michael Kors purse for Christmas!!! Did I mention that? I just about died!!! I was so excited!!! It's blue and so pretty!!! I love it!! I'm really dizzy today. That's not good. I should lay down, after I eat. maybe its low blood sugar. that's it. Constantine used to think I was diabetic, Cause he's a qualified dr. Right!! A very good looking dr. I wish him well. I will never see him again, unless its  concert, but I won't speak to him. I have nothing to say to him, I want to block him, and get my name back.

why do I bother at all. How can you mend a broken heart.

Basically right now, why do I bother at all with anything. My life sucks, I can't work, the man I love has a baby and the mother is with the baby so that's that. I mean nothing to anyone. I'm so down right now. All I know is that I'll never love anyone else. Never go out again, I'm so done, and I can't stop crying. All this because of a picture. I go see the doctor tomorrow, maybe she can give me some proprophol -adios Michael Jackson style. It wouldn't work, nothing works on me. Doomed never to sleep, I say I'll never see him again, but am really weak where he's concerned. Why am I torturing myself? At least I'll get some meds tomorrow and get out of pain for a little while, life is so unfair. Why some suffer so much and others skate through life unaffected by anything. I need to wrap up tonight, have to get up early to drive to Oceanside for the neurologist. How can you mend a broken heart? Loads of painkillers.